Housewife

Housewife (n)

1 : a married woman in charge of a household
2 : a pocket-size container for small articles (as thread)


Obviously my lovely Bebe does not want me to be the second part of this definition so I guess he is referring to the first part. It makes me laugh. (I do the laughing after I flip him off and tell him to go to hell) I have always loved cleanliness. I like clean. Clean works. Clean makes an small living area appear to be larger, and there really is more room because one is not trying to avoid the plates of half-eaten orange chicken next to the television. I have always picked up after myself. I do my laundry. I make the bed me and Mr. Bebe sleep in. I make sure any mess in the bathroom I have made because my ultra-steady hands yet again drop the blue eyeliner pencil is all wiped away. Point is I am clean.
Jonathan, though I love him dearly as you have probably already read a million times and probably want to puke kittens, is not clean. He likes to be in clean areas but does not make sure he helps clean.
He had this discussion with me a day or two after I lost my job and told me to just make sure the unit was in order. He dropped the "Housewife" bomb on me.

insert insane laughter here

Now that we are all done laughing this is what I have to say. According to Websters you have to a.) be married. Oh, don't worry there fellas I am not married yet. I have no ring. I see no wedding pictures anywhere, and let me just say I am too young. (No offense Mom, it is working for you but the whole "I-Got-Married-At-18-To-My-Only-Real-Boyfriend" does not seem too tempting to me yet.) I am not saying I am anti-marriage but oh boy now I am doing that thing I do where I start rambling about a different subject.
Pause. Continue: I am just saying that he should make an effort. This is not wash and dry. I am not a single mother expected to keep a whole apartment clean all by myself. I am not picking up his stinky socks, or underwear for him. He's a grown man. I figured that somewhere in his twenty-seven years (yes, there is an age scandal) someone taught him how to pick up after himself. I have been living with him for about ten months (he is lucky I cannot remember them all) and I am really sick of picking up after him.
If he wants me to be a housewife then I suggest he buy me the nicest Tiffany's ring, shell out for a grandiose wedding, and then maybe I will think about being June Cleaver. Until that day comes (which I hope it does not happen too soon because then I will have to clean "our" area) I am only cleaning up after myself!